Brain Fried Fey

Tags

3 Card, Fey, Reading, Swords, Tarot

I decided to post something on a lighter note today. Since I am transferring all my blog entries from my iWeb software many of the posts you will see are quite old. The following is a reading I did back in Jan of 2007 using one of my favorite decks the Fey Tarot. Enjoy!

This reading is part of an exercise I am doing on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum in the Fey Study forum. We will be doing 3 card readings every week and discussing them afterwards. So, without further ado, here is my past, present, future spread for the up coming week.

Well, first I must note that the 3 of pentacles fell out of the deck and slid across the floor while I was shuffling. This talks about my job. I see a Fey completely absorbed in his craft. This fey is painstakingly tending to the details of his work. He looks at it with a scrutinizing eye. The fey is dressed in pink and green both colors of the heart. His work is his passion and he puts his heart into it. The lizard on his shoulder represents his heart and passion leading him along. It too observes the work that has been done. He has all the tools he needs. This along with his passion and drive will lead him to complete his task with the utmost quality.

In the background stands a hooded fey who partially hides their face. It stands with it’s arms crossed as if it is impatiently waiting for the other fey to finish something. This fey holds a key around it’s waist which indicates it may have the answers the other fey needs or perhaps holds the key to the other fey’s future growth.

This card that fell out pretty much describes my work situation right now. I love the work I am doing and have been putting everything into this very important project I am working on. There is tons of work to do and really no time to worry about the details. There is also a hard deadline which is represented by the impatient looking fey in the back.

I have to begin by saying that I drew 3 swords.  This is a sure indication that the week ahead is going to really fry my brain. It will be a big challenge because there is so much to do and so little time. On top of this, I have a new person to train.

The Past – 2 of Swords – this card shows a fey with a look and stance as if it is charging at something. As it charges forward, the fey holds a dagger in front of it’s eyes blocking it’s site. It does not even see where it is going because it is so hell bent on getting there!  The moon in the background indicates a rather hazy and unclear view of the situation at best. The past has been all go, go, go with no time to think things through or asses the situation. The very accurately describes my situation at work. I am all geared up and my intentions were honorable, but perhaps I was not getting the best picture of the situation.

The Present – 9 of Swords – This defeated looking fey is on her knees, hugging herself. It looks like she is waiting for the sword to come down and take her life. The fey is shades of red and orange, both colors representing action and passion. It is interesting that the knife is tied to a rope and is not touching her. Does she realize that she is not in immediate danger? there is a star of hope in the sky outside her doorway if she would only look up and see it. The stairs going up are the only way out of her predicament emphasizing that the only way to go is up. I hope this is wrong, I really do. I have this feeling that I am going to go to work tomorrow and find my manager ready to pile on the work since the person replacing me has started today. I am quite sure that I am going to be feeling quite overwhelmed until this person is adequately trained. Perhaps I might feel that because I am behind, I am failing. I most look forward, not wallow in self torment.

The Future – 5 of Swords – A larger than life dagger is wedged into the desert sands. There is no life visible from where this sits. On the handle of the dagger sits a fey of orange color wearing a flowing orange wrap. From the palm of her hand she blows away star dust. above her head her spirit essence flows towards the sky.  I know exactly what this card means. It means I take my laptop and my piles of work and I find an empty office or meeting room and hide from everyone that interrupts me or needs my time. Sometimes this is the only way to get it done. The dagger is larger than life now, but rather than let it overcome her like it almost did in the 9 of Swords, she has now gotten a ‘handle’ on it. It is still huge, but she is on top of it. She blows her stardust because she can not help anyone else with anything other than that knowledge she has left them with in the past. I keep my Reiki Principles on the wall by my desk reading them when things are crazy keeps me in touch with the Divine and helps keep things in perspective. a lot like what is represented by the connection between the fey’s head and the universe.

My First Death Experience

Tags

Death, Journal, Major Arcana, Meditation, visualization

This is a meditation I did by entering the Death card. It was written in my journal on 8/30/03. It is a bit different than the one I previously posted a few days ago. Entering the cards is an excellent way to learn meanings for them. It gives you  a personal experience to draw upon in future readings.

I went into the card. I saw the bodies to my left falling as he quietly rode by. Just shells left behind.  He paused before he got to me and then looked at me straight on and pointed at me. Immediately I felt my body go limp. Before I even hit the ground I was gone. I flew like I was catapulted and weightless. I went into the spirit world. I saw my spirit guide smiling at me. Daddy was there, I noticed out of the corner of my eye. In front of me were 2 men. One, I knew, had been my father in another life.  I went to my Dad and my Grandma was beside him. Both were welcoming me. I hugged them both. They both looked happy. I went to my guide and we held each other close. I thanked her for all she does for me.

I turned back to my father and brother from another life. It was a life I had envisioned before where I was an old Indian woman with weathered hands. Lonely and an out cast. In that life, my father and brother had been  killed in a war with another tribe and I was made a slave by them. I had lost my freedom. I could have become a part of this new tribe but I refused. Knowing I’d be with them again someday is all that kept me going.

It felt so good to see them all again. My father told me I had to let go of my fear of being captive in order to find happiness. I can’t describe the overwhelming emotions I felt when seeing them again. How enlightened I felt. It was as if things suddenly made sense. Not only was this experience of “Death” painless, it brought forth so much knowledge and freedom and understanding.

Daddy told me it was time for me to go back and then suddenly I was on the field this time on the other side of Death. The field was large and fertile. He pointed out over the fields and told me my life was before me.  When I first went into the card, the sun was going down between the towers. Now the sun was coming up between the towers. Death told me to get on his hoarse and I rode with him toward the towers. As soon as we rode through the towers Death became the naked boy in the sun card. We were laughing and happy. I felt so free!!! The sun was beating down on us and I was very hot. I realized now that I was the only one on the hoarse. I hugged the horse’s neck. There were beautiful flowers everywhere. Lots of sunflowers.

My thoughts after this:

Being afraid of what the future might bring. Transformation, rebirth. Permanent change.  A revitalizing force that sweeps through you. Change is required. If you don’t change willingly, well, the Tower will take care of that.  You will be reborn.

Release your fears and look ahead. Today is new, the past is dead. Hanging on could mean lost opportunities. Experience is the greatest teacher. Worry will get you no where.

Reversed – You are putting off necessary changes out of fear. You are stuck in old habits and you don’t want to put forth the effort to change them. Depression. Don’t let things slide. Come to grips with life. Make new goals. “Time and work will change it all, stand up straight or you may fall”.

Death Card Meditation

Tags

Journal, Major Arcana, Meditation

Death card meditation

I wanted to write something really amazing since it has been so long a time since I have blogged. I also have changed my blogging software. Apple is no longer supporting iWeb which is what I used for my on line journal.

I have been longing for change in my life, but like many I am afraid of the “what ifs”. To overcome this fear I have been immersing myself in the Death card. To bring renewal and change we must face our fears head on. One of the things I have always found helpful when seeking growth from the cards is to enter into the card for a little one on one interaction! I have done this with the Death card years ago and I will post that one as well, but here is what I got from it yesterday:

When I entered the card it was very barren and I could smell dead leaves rotting. There were many frightened people. I could feel the fear. The castle was shut off and this made me realize that fear causes us to shut ourselves off. We lose our humanity.

The people in the card were cowering from the Death Rider. When I looked at him, there seemed to be a veil distorting my view. In this veil there was a diamond shaped opening through which I could see clearly. I stepped through this doorway.

On the other side of the veil every thing was white. Not like light or as if I was on a cloud, but white like “nothing”. The horse was white and on the horse the Death Rider now appeared almost like an angel except his eyes were black. He wore white robes instead of armor and had blond hair and flesh. He still looked ominous but in a pre way. I wasn’t sure if I was going to get on the horse in front or in back of him. When I climbed on the horse I ended up being “in ” him. The horse took off and we began riding aimlessly into white nothingness. So I kept riding and going no where in nothingness waiting for the next thing to happen. Nothing happened. The horse just kept running until I realized I needed to talk to this hoarse. The hoarse stopped and I got down. He was milky white except for his black eye that was looking into me. It spoke, “I need to talk to you, Amy”. I knew it was very hard for him to speak so I told him to just “think” it. That is when the message for me started flowing:

“You took the first step and faced your fears by getting on my back. (IRL I am very afraid of horses!). When a hoarse senses your fears they react without reason and run in no apparent direction. You let go of your fear and that is when I stopped and listened. Now you can direct me and I will do the work while you lead me. You need to face and control your fears at all times. They can carry you far if you face them and give them direction! Keep them on the path. Make me work for you not against you. ”

In retrospect, my weakness is getting side tracked and loosing sight of my goals. I have so many ideas I want to bring to fruition that nothing gets done. I need to focus on one project at a time and not get distracted by fears and doubts. Just do it! Acknowledge my fears and then move on.

Once I understood this the diamond in the veil appeared again. I stepped through and was back into the card. As I was leaving the card I turned around and looked back at the Death Rider who was back to his skeletal form and he looked back and gave me a wink!