This is a meditation I did by entering the Death card. It was written in my journal on 8/30/03. It is a bit different than the one I previously posted a few days ago. Entering the cards is an excellent way to learn meanings for them. It gives you a personal experience to draw upon in future readings.
I went into the card. I saw the bodies to my left falling as he quietly rode by. Just shells left behind. He paused before he got to me and then looked at me straight on and pointed at me. Immediately I felt my body go limp. Before I even hit the ground I was gone. I flew like I was catapulted and weightless. I went into the spirit world. I saw my spirit guide smiling at me. Daddy was there, I noticed out of the corner of my eye. In front of me were 2 men. One, I knew, had been my father in another life. I went to my Dad and my Grandma was beside him. Both were welcoming me. I hugged them both. They both looked happy. I went to my guide and we held each other close. I thanked her for all she does for me.
I turned back to my father and brother from another life. It was a life I had envisioned before where I was an old Indian woman with weathered hands. Lonely and an out cast. In that life, my father and brother had been killed in a war with another tribe and I was made a slave by them. I had lost my freedom. I could have become a part of this new tribe but I refused. Knowing I’d be with them again someday is all that kept me going.
It felt so good to see them all again. My father told me I had to let go of my fear of being captive in order to find happiness. I can’t describe the overwhelming emotions I felt when seeing them again. How enlightened I felt. It was as if things suddenly made sense. Not only was this experience of “Death” painless, it brought forth so much knowledge and freedom and understanding.
Daddy told me it was time for me to go back and then suddenly I was on the field this time on the other side of Death. The field was large and fertile. He pointed out over the fields and told me my life was before me. When I first went into the card, the sun was going down between the towers. Now the sun was coming up between the towers. Death told me to get on his hoarse and I rode with him toward the towers. As soon as we rode through the towers Death became the naked boy in the sun card. We were laughing and happy. I felt so free!!! The sun was beating down on us and I was very hot. I realized now that I was the only one on the hoarse. I hugged the horse’s neck. There were beautiful flowers everywhere. Lots of sunflowers.
My thoughts after this:
Being afraid of what the future might bring. Transformation, rebirth. Permanent change. A revitalizing force that sweeps through you. Change is required. If you don’t change willingly, well, the Tower will take care of that. You will be reborn.
Release your fears and look ahead. Today is new, the past is dead. Hanging on could mean lost opportunities. Experience is the greatest teacher. Worry will get you no where.
Reversed – You are putting off necessary changes out of fear. You are stuck in old habits and you don’t want to put forth the effort to change them. Depression. Don’t let things slide. Come to grips with life. Make new goals. “Time and work will change it all, stand up straight or you may fall”.